May I Be Frank 11:46 PM

I got some BEAUTIFUL hugs tonight. On top of everything else, I got some beautiful hugs at one of the greatest events I've ever attended.

This evening Heather and I drove out to the Rose Temple Venice Beach to attend a screening of a movie called May I Be Frank. I found out about this through Jason Mraz's blog. He has a song in the movie and fully endorses the film as "an amazing gift." He was right. The film is a low budget documentary of a man named Frank over 42 days as he transforms his body, mind, and soul through a lifestyle change that involves a raw foods diet, holistic medicine, positive affirmations, yoga, forgiveness, letting go, and a cleansing of his spirit. It starts when Frank walked into Cafe Gratitude in San Francisco one day and a young worker there named Ryland asked him, "what is one thing you want to do before you die?" And Frank said. "I want to fall in love one more time. But no one will love me looking the way I do." So Ryland and his friends take him on as a project and you get to see it all raw, real, funny, painful, INSPIRING, brilliant, and loving. There was so much love in this movie. I felt proud of Frank for working hard and felt happy there are people in this world with hearts of gold. I saw all kinds of pieces of myself and in the end felt so motivated to just keep on trying to live my best.

Watch.

There was a bout 200 people there, in this room of believers. I felt very much in my element. We clapped through it, laughed, and cried. The movie showcased some gorgeous souls and promoted a true belief in love, positivity, possibility, and beauty. Jason wrote a song for the movie called What Would Love Do and played it live as the credits rolled. After it was done Frank himself came out onstage with Ryland, both of them with beaming smiles and pure hearts. They did a question and answer session and as Frank talked it was clear that he surely did fall in love again. He fell in love with himself. My favorite question asked was by a teenage boy who stood up and said that he spent the year applying to colleges and filling out forms to be read by people who would judge him and that something about that just isn't right, it should be about growth like this, inspiration, and about gratitude. With a shaky voice and tears in his eyes he openly gave one of the most genuine thank yous I have heard and asked Frank for a hug. Beautiful moment. It was amazing to watch this positivity build.

When it was over Heather and I hung out for a bit and I got to meet and thank Frank and got a warm hug from him. It is truly something to see him as a severely unhealthy man in the beginning of them film and then face a vibrant human being so full of compassion. I met Ryland also who is this absolutely beautifully happy human being, hugging everyone like a brother. I was especially taken by his presence in the film, he's one of those people who are just magnetic, and to remember that and the beauty of the movie I asked him for an affirmation. He wrote down, "I am the one." Thank you.

Of course I wanted to talk to Jason. We've met on 2 other occasions but it's been about 3 years since then and I was curious to see if he would remember me at all. He was standing outside on Rose St. and when I approached him he looked at me and smiled.

"Tell me your name again?" he said. Yessss he remembered!!!

He gave me a nice hug and I told him that since the last time we talked I've been around the world nearly twice and through all my travels his I've felt like his song I'm Yours is following me around. It's everywhere, and I started making these mental notes everytime I heard it.... on a train in Hong Kong, at a kebab restaurant in Bordeaux, on a beach in Bali.... and that each time it's a nice reminder of home, and whenever I'd hear it I would take it as a good sign and smile. I told him about recording an album in India and gave him a copy, and like with Ryland I asked him to write down a good quote or encouraging saying to put up in my new apartment. So on a piece of paper he wrote "There is only love. Everything else is our resistance to it." He said it's one of his personal favorites and that he has that posted up in his home as a reminder.

I just love that this movie exists. It is a voice that contributes to forward moving positive change, and shows that through the potential of one human being. We ALL have it. We do. Be Love.

Luck 10:05 PM

The first CD I ever owned I won off a radio contest. I was twelve years old and happened to be the right caller on KBIG's top 9 at 9 contest. I won a CD by the band the Northern Pikes. I didn't even have a CD player and had to go over to my friend Sara's house to listen to it on her dad's stereo.

Movie Script Ending 10:13 PM

Dear Ben Gibbard,

Thank you for existing.

Love, Ami

Sitting next to my new turntable spinning a Joni Mitchell album that is sending the sweetest melodies into my tired mind. Tired from way more work than I am used to, way more excitement than I anticipated this week, and from an ammmaaaaazing show last night. Oh, Ben Gibbard. I adore his songwriting down to my soul and his voice is one of the best I've ever heard. Ever.

Last week I found out he was going to play a show at Largo which is a small venue in LA that holds only about 250 people. It sold out before I found out about it. I was concerned at how I was going to get a ticket because how would anyone have a ticket to spare to something this great. I mean, I saw this guy's band play the Hollywood Bowl last year. But with some hope and a good intention I put up a posting on craigslist asking if anyone had an extra ticket and saying I really want to go and get a big dose of inspiration.

The night before the show I got an email from a guy named Toby saying his sister got sick and he and his wife and kids are going to the show and now have an extra ticket to sell to me. I called him up and we made plans to meet and it was as simple as that. Toby was set on getting their early to get a good seat so I met up with him early, we got our tickets and I ended up in the second row! I had a couple hours to kill before the show started and as I wondered what to do with myself, the two girls who were in line in front of me asked me if I wanted to join them for dinner. So I spent the next couple hours around the Beverly Center with new friends, a super good ticket in my pocket, and the anticipation of seeing Ben.

When we got back to the theater we hung around outside for a while in this beautiful indoor/outdoor lobby. I ran into Dimitri Martin who was a friendly reminder of Risa, who would have been the ideal companion for this show, but at least I was there to represent both of us. She would have fallen to her knees when walking into the venue. I almost did. It looked like an old movie theater with a stage instead of a screen. Small and intimate. And my seat was so CLOSE. Right before 9 one of the staff members made some announcements to make sure everyone had their cell phones off and went over the guideline, the major one being no talking during the show.

I just adore Ben Gibbard. And not in that way, to make it clear I also adore is wife. I love that there is a human being out there like him that is alive and making music. He walked onstage casually with his guitar and went straight into Steadier Footing. Just him and his guitar, and sometimes he played piano. He played THIRTY-ONE SONGS! Even that flew by and he said funny things and sweet things and kept asking the audience if we were okay. The highlights to me were the Death Cab and Postal Service songs. He played Soul Meets Body on piano with a slower and darker rhythm so it was like a different song with the same brilliant lyrics. Cath acoustic had me melting. He played a bunch of covers too including a She and Him song which he said was written by his favorite songwriter. How does he keep getting better?

Such Great Heights brought back gorgeous travel memories. Watching sunsets at the ashram with Rory. Going up the lift in the Eiffel Tower with Risa. Being in the sky, somewhere. I listen to that song on almost every plane ride.

The show was one huge long moment of beauty. I was so happy to be there. I very much appreciated the simplicity of it. And there were quite a few moments where I realized this isn't a whole lot different than what I do. He messed up sometimes and smiled. He had his setlist next to him on a half piece of paper. At times his songs started sounding the same. He seemed so normal up there. A person playing songs.

It's ALL happening! 10:02 PM

Sitting here in a moment of pure potential, one of those moments of anticipation..... where you know something great is about to happen, it's just a matter of days, hours, or minutes. It's like that feeling I get before getting on an airplane and knowing my bags are packed and I have my ticket in hand it's just a matter of my row being called to board and off I go into possibility. Or the feeling of meeting someone new and knowing there is a connection, there just needs to be that spark to light it up. Or that feeling of seeing Dave Grohl standing across the room and thinking, "I'm about to meet one of my biggest heroes. My life is about to change. Whooaaa this is gonna be good."

All that's happened to me many times. But this moment of anticipation is about change, goals, and joy manifested by:

LIVING:

I'm going to be moving! And I've never been more excited to live in an apartment. I have enjoyed my living situation with the Kawazoes over the past two years. I am immensely grateful for their generosity and giving me a comfortable home to come back to while I explored the world. It allowed me to have so much freedom that I got to do every single thing I wanted. However it's now time for another kind of freedom and for me to get back on my own two feet a little more independently. I've decided to do this by the beach. One thing that hit me on my last trip was how truly great Southern California is and I am going to live it up in everything she has to offer me.

So in this coming week I am moving into an apartment just off of Pacific Coast Highway in Redondo Beach! All I have to do is turn the corner, walk a few minutes to the end of the street, down some stairs, and there is the sand and the ocean and the dolphins. I'm going to buy a bike (2 bikes even! so that you can ride with me!) and some new running shoes. And I'm going to get a new turntable and listen to my vinyl records again and get my queen size mattress set up and I'm going to paint my room a pretty shade of green and get some wood furniture and wine glasses and have guests over and become friends with my new roomies. So exciting.

FUN:

Tomorrow starts the first of 10 straight days of work but I don't mind being that I've had so much free time over the past couple weeks and I've enjoyed it with all my heart. A couple Wednesdays ago I met up with Nat in Fullerton and we spent the entire afternoon at a hookah lounge smoking up some yummy organic non-tobacco hookah and eating falafels. I've been seeing lots of live music from my friends who I am so proud of to John Cruz to a band called Deigo's Umbrella that was the craziest mix of genres all in one set. Last night was reggae night and I got to dance and drink two dollar beers and feel happy.

MUSIC:

Yesterday was another source of excitement in full effect. Scott and I spent most of the day laying down tracks for the new version of Little Crow. My new album is in the works. I plan to make it a 10 song LP that we will slowly work on. The project is getting my creative mind spinning and working hard. For a couple of weeks last month I was in a dry spell musically and had little motivation to pick up my guitar, but it's all come back with a vengence. When I was younger, recorded music seemed to be something that came from some other world. But here I am doing it too.

CAREER:

Lots of doors opening up. I've started teaching yoga privately (and loooving it). I kept saying that I got my yoga certification without the intention of actually teaching, but I've been enjoying it so much. I've gotten in touch with a local music store and will soon be starting up music therapy sessions there. And my vision of my long term business goals are slowly becoming clearer.

Magic in the air. Anticipation. Excitement. Optimism.

Thank you.